The term Yes Man has gotten a bad rap. People think of it as someone who is willing to say anything to fit in, or to please a boss. I’m inviting you to look at in another way…
Mary is a friend of mine. A couple of years ago I was her internship supervisor while she was getting her master’s degree in counseling from Central Connecticut State University. She’s a fantastic school counselor: warm, smart, assertive and a great listener.
She’s also out of a job at the moment. Too many people looking for too few openings.
Mary just finished up a temporary counseling assignment for a school counselor who was out on maternity leave. She was looking at her job prospects. Not all bad news…she actually had an interview scheduled for today. I just sent her an email to find out how it went.
We were talking about her job prospects last week. One of the things she was worried about is coming off like a “Yes Man” (or woman, in her case). She figured that if she seemed as if she was too agreeable, she either wouldn’t get hired at all, or would wind up in a position where she’d be treated like a second class citizen, willing to do whatever her principal wanted.
I understand where she’s coming from. No one wants to be seen as a toadie to a boss…willing to “go along to get along.”
I told her what I’m about to tell you. Being a “yes person” doesn’t mean you have to blindly agree with what those around you say or do. My version of a “yes man” is someone who is looking for a reason to say…
“YES! I want to try something new or different. I want to put energy, passion and sweat into something I love to do!
YES! I am happy to go outside my comfort zone to learn new skills that will make me better at what I do. I am happy to try new things that will make me more valuable to those I serve.”
That’s my idea of a “Yes Man.”
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Before Mary, the graduate student I trained was a young woman in her 20’s. She was full of energy, and fire. She was willing to work hard and try on new behaviors that would make her a better counselor. She was willing to do the hard work on herself.
And she was willing to be such a “Yes Man” that she went to her supervisor at the college when she disagreed with me about a student. I told her what should be done, and she very politely (and somewhat embarrassed) told me she disagreed and wanted to bring it to her adviser.
That’s the best kind of “yes man…someone who says “Yes, I have the courage to do what I think is right even if it gets me in trouble.”
I complimented her on her assertiveness and bravery. She believed in what she was doing so strongly, she was willing to go against the person (me) who would complete her evaluation.
And guess what? She got a job right out of her internship! She’s a terrific middle school counselor.
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Should you be a “Yes Man?”
YES…if you think of someone who says yes to challenges, to being a team player, to respectfully but firmly doing what feels right even if it’s against the rules.
And saying yes to listening to the opinions of others, and being willing to take in new ideas that serve you.
So if you’re building your business, or looking to advance in your career, or doing anything that involves doing something new, different or scary, do yourself a favor…
Be a “Yes Man.”
Your Affirmative Pal,
Larry
NO MORE HOLDING BACK
Join us at THE MANIFESTING EXPERIMENT, our Facebook group, where we say yes as often as possible (and even sometimes when it’s impossible!).
The GETTING OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY class is approaching Week Two. Got room for more “yes people.” A recording of Week One is available for people who want to catch up and throw down with us. Details: http://NoMoreHoldingBack.com/yourway Message me for tuition plans.